Almost every Wednesday, since the beginning of the pandemic, three friends and I have met via Zoom to discuss Al-Anon books. This connection is heartfelt and genuine. The accountability to do the work and show up has deepened our friendships. I have also gotten to know myself better, and that is always a plus. Recently we decided to venture outside of our program and have been working from a book called "1000 Things You Don't Know About Me". This book was a gift to our group from one of our participants this past holiday season. As soon as I saw it, I thought it would be great to base our next go-round of meetings on the questions posed in this colorful tome.
We have answered queries like: One day I hope to meet... The one thing I really want to change about myself is...Some people say I am weird because... Five questions per page, five pages discussed per week. At this rate it is going to take almost four years to complete these mini essays. Talk about commitment!
"The best advice I ever received was..." popped up last week. I wrote about a few ditties my parents had often said, and others shared about wise parental words as well. Another lady shared this sage speech from her dad "Memories are more important than your hair". Without context it elicited a few chuckles. Dads! Sheesh! Then the backstory was shared - and I paraphrase here - this gal wanted to be on drill team in high school and that would require styling her hair to conform to a uniform standard. She did not want to cut her curls and her dad imparted the memory / hair statement to encourage her to go ahead and join the team. What I initially thought comical was actually sensible. Memories are more important than hair.
Later that afternoon I found myself in Boulder visiting my daughter and granddaughter. The original plan was for me to occupy Penelope while my daughter finished up schoolwork and then I would have a haircut sometime in the early evening. It was a warm day and sitting on the back porch would provide a perfect setting to shape my locks. But as the evening went on and dinner was made, and dishes were done, and toddler bath time was upon us - my haircut fell to the wayside. Bedtime came and I enjoyed three-year-old cuddles and a few kicks in the back all night long.
Mornings with little ones are quick! Get up, get dressed, get going. For my daughter that meant getting to campus. For Penny and me it meant a good tooth brushing before going to her dental appointment. Which by the way was a good check up! Next up was taking Penny to school and me continuing my own day which included a visit to my son in Longmont.
There is a road that connects Boulder and Longmont called The Diagonal. It is a mini-highway with little traffic mid-morning. On that drive one may see remnants of the last Boulder County farms yet to succumb to development, a few cows and even low flying planes reading to disperse sky divers into Vance Johnson Airport. It is a nice ride that requires reflection as the scenery goes by.
I was disappointed but not upset about not having my coiffure. (In the week after this occurrence, my hair has begun to exit that awkward in-between stage. I like it again, though it does need a good shaping) On that short ride between seeing my daughter and her daughter and enjoying lunch with my son the words from my book club meeting came back to me. I'd had a wonderful visit with my girls - picking Penny up from school, treating her to an overpriced ice cream on Pearl St, cooking dinner for all of us, orchestrating bath time, reading bedtime books and all-night snuggling with a delightful little girl. Spending relaxing time with my youngest child in a home she has made her own - good food and even better conversation... What was it my that was said in book club just over 24 hours before?
Memories are more important than hair. I couldn't agree more.
